It was around this time after my last surgery that I had my first relapse. I remember it well, I had decided that I was well enough to try and fix the toilet and in lifting the lid off the toilet I felt that overwhelming burn of nerve pain shoot through my back. My first instinct was anger. How was this possible? After all, the surgery was supposed to have fixed me right? The anger was quickly replaced by an overwhelming and long lasting bout of self pity during which time I flirted with the notion that I would never be better and that I may even be permanently broken despite the operation. Surprisingly this feeling lasted only as long as the residual pain which was a few days however it made an indelible mark on my psyche of which I am still acutely aware. I was suddenly aware that the surgery was not the end of my problems and that not only was I going to have to submit to years of care and diligent awareness of my movement but the notion of a repeat surgery was already growing inside me. This time around I am very much more careful with what I am doing and I am refusing to take risks with my recovery. I do need to go and see my Occ Health department to discuss my return to work but my mind will be firmly stuck in that small bathroom almost 10 years ago when my invincibility was certainly permanently damaged.
With that in mind here is an update as to my status for various activities.
Walking: I can walk 3km max but I require at least an hour recovery afterwards.
Bodyweight workouts: I can do most of the exercises with the exception of burpees but again, I require lengthy rest after only 10-15 minutes.
Weights: I can handle some weights as long as my back is protected and there is no bending. Resting and soreness for at least 3 days after this.
Running: Nope.
Pullups: Not yet.
Sitting: I can sit for about an hour or so before I start to cramp and get sore. Requires at least another hour of laying to recover.
Standing: Standing is not a problem mostly and is my preferred state at this time given that my shoulders ache if I lay too long. Yes, welcome to my hell, even laying down makes me sore.
Driving: Same as sitting even with the heated seat on.
Sleeping: Sleep is generally OK without the memory foam topper we had. The hardest part is getting up, not because I hate my life but it just takes a while for me to warm up to moving again.
General Housework: Impossible.
There you have it. A general outline of how I am doing.
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